.::Life is a journey, not a destination::.

.::MAD MAD MAD::.. (18 / March / 2010)

2010-03-17T23:54:00.000-07:00

I'm just so mad now. Like fucking fuckedup mad.
Why is it always me who loses a debate at the end.
Why is it I'm the one who starts the confessions.
Why is it me who always been misunderstood and accuse.
Why is always the situation has be turned around and back to me.

Accusions, misunderstandings, betrays, portrays, impression.
Fucked up words.

Its always ME who gets the wrong impression.
And often was HIM who portrays the wrong impressions.
And I'M the one who has always been accussed of misunderstandings and get people thinking that I'm the one who started all of this to betray him just because he was the one who phrase it in 'THAT'way.

I don't understand..
I don't know how to solve this.
If I tell him what I dislike..
He'll sarcarsticly stop doing that thing dramatically.
I don't know how to elaborate on this part..

In the moment of despair..
I wanna breakdown..
Because of this accident which i didn't want to start it ((but its just so unbearable to ignore it))
I spoke harshly to my elder sis when she asked me what time I was going out (So that she'd be able to cook for me)
You'd be heart broken if you were me.
Very depressed, frustrated, anger raging, and I'm easily irritated when this feelings possesses me.

Its not the way you want it to be..
Its just how it happened to be
Fuck prophercies cuz it probably fucked up his mind.
Which probably fucked me up to.
Sucks to be him.
Sucks to be me.

Sometimes, I wish I didn't met him.
Sometimes, its fortunate to have him.

He knows how to make me forgive him.
But I still can't be hard on him.

Generally, it just makes me feel that sometimes, without friends is better. Their such a pain in the ass.

But sometimes, its a gift to have friends..

Its like..
Yes / No
A / B
Good / Bad

It goes on..
There's only alternatives in life..

.::What do I get back in return::. (8 / March / 2010)

2010-03-08T05:50:00.000-08:00

Man.. This few days aint turning out well for me..
Well.. Should put it in a way that I'm heartless / simply can't be bothered / turning into an emotionless man?
You decide..

See.. My mom had a talk with me last Saturday night.. She told me why she wasn't satisfied about her pay due to the deduction of CPF.. Somehow, she would lose 6% of her salary from now onwards..
She's planning on working a part time job.
I reminisced my sis told me this would happen in long terms if we don't work hard and have good qualifications.
It didn't really matter to me at that point of time.
And now, sitting here, listening to my mom's remorseful words just shows how much she's willing to suffer just to keep us under this roof.
I advice her in a harsh way as I'm not used to being dramatic and mushy with my family.
I told her: You're considered "lucky" to have this job. You can simply just do nothing for the whole day, enjoying the air-con with carpeted floors and wheeling chairs.. It's very convinient. Whereas, if she'd be going to people's house to pack or do chores for them, its much more tiring. (Which was what she was planning for her part-time job).
I DON'T WANT my mom to be serving other family, the feeling is just not right. It's so much similar as being a maid in other people's house. And I know kids nowadays are awefully rude. They could simply do things without even thinking. Notorious?
Besides, my mom's condition isn't really good. She'd get sick easily..
And i can assure that if she's sick, she'll be emitted to the hospital, no joke.. She is that "fragile". Now you see the reason why?

Now moving on.. I FUCKING LOST MY PERSONAL FILE!
Yea, didn't brag much about it in school.
BUT, I just found out that my N level cert was in it when my mom accused me of not wanting to reply her messages. Then she asked how did my search for the file went. And that's when all the commotion started.

SHIT up man..
On Sunday, I sat on the dining table, thinking, recalling so hard. Where did my diary went too? Then, I went to find my file to do assignments.
And I reallised that it was not here nor my bags.
I panicked. Its like, what could have gotten worst? Now that i have to make all the copies that i've lost. Just great.
And before I knew it, the next day. N LEVEL CERTIFICATE M.I.A
Fking dumb ass, why didn't you give your parents to keep it.
Now I know why filing is important.
I'm so troubled right now, frustrated.
You can say that i'm in a delimma.

And guess what, I'm suprised that I didn't cried. In the past, I used to cry about everything single thing that I don't have a solution to it. I'm wondering why's it so. "This would sound ridiculous, but I've tried crying in the bathroom before"... Epic fail.

What's with me. What have I done wrong to deserve all these? What could have possibly been worst than this? I don't wanna know. So much for lost stuff and broken heart. __ Peace out.

.::Change much?::. [8/1/2010]

2010-01-08T07:04:00.000-08:00

Been long I've updated my blog.
I wanted to give up writing a blog, everyday got to update.. Even if there's nothing to talk about.

I don't want to bore you guys with my mundane routine. Cuz you guys are already experiencing it. So what for right?
I didn't think of writing an entry to this blog for quite sometime.. Even though I had something going on.

But sometimes.. Things have to spill cuz its too full. I need a listening ear. There has been quite much going on.

I can't get it off my chest. I don't want it to stick on me. And that is why.. I'm writing an entry post now.

People say.. if this side is bad, look on the other side. The grass is always cleaner on the other side..

Well, in my case. I don't feel this way. Both sides are messed. In fact, not only 2 sides. I have more than that. More than 2 problems to solve with.

***For years:
What I can't get off my chest is that. I always feel that I'm a little different from other guys. But don't get me wrong. I go crazy over girls alright! Its just that.. I don't like soccer, basketball.. Just those outdoor sports. And, I express my feelings differently. Common. I just need someone to understand, I'm living with 2 sisters. All I look up too was my sister, or should I say.. All I CAN look up to was a girl as a role model. So, sometimes my action tend to be misleading. I receive insults and hurtful comments. Í noted these things even though I told my other friends that I ignore and I don't take it seriously at all. Because I don't want them to stand up for me, getting both parties in trouble. Ending up, no one benefits anything. Whats the point of fighting.. Right? Back to the the title.. I'm more sensitive than other guys I guess? I reflect more? And I don't fight back. Thats unlikely a guy you might say. Because I don't want to make it into a bigger matter. I just hate getting into trouble you know.. Thats why you don't see me scolding vulgarities at people or punch a stranger even when he physically tries to irritate me or get attention.

***Friends:
Not the main one.. Maybe you can say, the second issue? Let me start off with this sentence: Its sucks to be alright when your friend is not. This is shit. Nothing I could do.. And end with a friend whom you have been with 5 years. Knowing your weak and strong points. Biggest mistake of my life to share all my things with him? Sometimes I feel I'm being toyed with and teased at. And I call them friends. Pathetic much? He knows my weak points. Literally proving that he's studying and saying stuff that he knows I haven't learn before. It really stresses me out (and he knows that), he don't just do it for a couple of minutes.. He did it for a good 2 periods till time's up. And he'll look at me. When I'm studying, he'll probably distract me or get me caught up into a conversation and distract me from what I initially wanted to do [which was to study]. I know this whole things kinda boring. I don't want to bore you with my grandpa story. So I'll cut the story short. After all these things, I still call them friends. I forgive him when he talks to me just because he make me laugh. He knows me well enough I must say.

***Personal Problem:
Lately, I've reallised I don't laugh much nor do I cry at all, even if I wanted too, I couldn't. When I watch comedy show, I'd just smile, but my mind literally is laughing. But of course, horny jokes trigger my laughter. I don't laugh, I don't cry, I seldom smile, I look down floor, I don't look at people anymore, I get weird stares and often paranoid when it happens. I'm like a total douch, changed person, person to bore with. This sucks so much. This isn't me. I don't want to be an emo kiddo. I'm afraid that it might happen. Ending living alone, eating alone, studying alone, going out alone, doing chores alone. The worst part, no one to be your listening ear.. Cuz everyone knows that I'm bored. Stupid old topic...

***Parents:
Parents getting old, age catching up on them. Problems arise.. No doubt they'll complain. Knees, ankle, back, head.. Money issues this early for me to start thinking what to do. No more letting your parents problems for you. Instead, you solve it for youself and your parents. Early pay back time? Start thinking of alternatives to get money. Work hard.. Part time.. Fast money..
Money problems.. O levels.. Education.. Assignments.. Deadlines..

***Aside:
Aside from all these issues that I'm dealing with. Got to think of O levels.. Examinations.. Term after term has an upcoming one. A never ending pressurised year. A short year I must say.. Its short because you don't have the time to reallise that time is passing cuz your too busy working hard. Its short only if you think that way. Exams.. Let me go into detail. Coping with all subjects. English comprehension questions.. I always tend to think more, write more than what its needed. There's where I lose points. But I don't know if I crossed the line! I guess practice makes perfect. Hope it grows on me. Chinese? Feeling there's a little hope. Math , Science and Humanities. Just practice till your finger bends like bendy straws.

***Lastly:
Its just hard to live life the fullest when you have so many things you got to accomplish before you're able to do the things you want. Seeing a camera man with a slash round his neck rushing to somewhere else.. He isn't enjoying his work. To work is to be satified and to enjoy doing your work, devote and contribtute to your community. Life has too much sufferings. Lets stop here before it gets too deep and dark.

.::Class Outing? Or not?::. [30 / November / 2009]

2009-12-01T05:11:00.000-08:00

Hey guys, long time didn't update again.
Not much to write, stayed at home most of the time.

Class outing? Didn't turn well for most of us I guess.
1pm went to Nelly's house with Fariha to cook Megoreng.
Was a success with Nelly's guidiance. However, she's sick, was a pity she couldn't come along with us! D=
I gave her the farewell present first in case she didn't come later on at 6pm. And luckily I did.

Me and Eea took cap twice to West Coast.
Met with Aini and walked to BBQ pit 2 together.

Reached there, Alim was holding his guitar, standing on the pit shouting something hahaha.
Was glad to finally meet them. But on the other side, was tired. I didn't get enough sleep. Moreover, did my first cooking!!!!

We bit hi to each other and exchanged cordial smiles.

After that.. I didn't know what to do, I just put my bag, and everything seem fine, everyone seems like they're all caught up with each other. Was glad though.
But if Nelly was there, it'll be much better to tag along and get into a conversation.

I just don't know how to start a conversation, what topic, what to talk about. It's been long since I met them, so I didn't really know what to start off with.
I just set at the second table which is near-opposite Grace, Alim, Cynthia and Jia Jin's table.

No one came to talk to me, neither did I went there.
Cuz if I knew if I'm there, I would be just pasting around.
Its been quite awhile, and I still couldn't come up with something to talk about, having a long conversation filled with laughter. So might as well I stayed, was resting too.

Quite intense atmostphere in my world. Was all in my world ATM.

As the world revolved, the sky is darker. People came, more friends joining us, felt better.
More food, everyone LOOKS like their having great time chilling out and of course showing off muscles........

We played some games like 007-bang, 1234 games, frisby. Invited some peeps but they don't want. So I didn't really go pester them and enjoyed the game with Cynthia and all.
I felt quite lousy at the 1234 game tho, I kept on being touched and let our opponents get the points.

Later on at night, Shahlis, Noh, Hasif, Syduh, Cynthia, Grace and I decided to go to the pyramid for a play.
I'm sorry Alim, at that point of time I was so excited about the pyramid, enever tried since was primary 5. Until you asked me where I was going then I asked you. And by the words u replied, can see you were quite dissapointed, angry with me. I asked you several times though, and also asked for help to help you come with us. but you still didn't. In the end, went without him. I'm so sorry ALIM!!!

Later on at the pyramid, we took photos, everyone was trembling. Funny!! All was like, DON'T LOOK DOWN!!! Then later a ball drops from the upper of pyramid. And lend with quite a loud thud on the sand. I was like oh shit!

After that went to flying fox, a low one. Super fun when 2 person pushes you.
Tried to push Cynthia but I'm too weak TT. Like didn't have much strength..

After that headed back to pit 2. I started to packed up, then Falaa, and all helped me.

Later on decicded to chill and eat at west coast mac. Wasn't sure to head home and hit the hay or chill.

Later on, Shahlis, Noh, Hasif, Falaah decided to sit Fariha's car. Her father drove us to Pioneer mall mac as planned.

Then Shahlis and Noh was sitting beside me, kept laughing. I don't know whats happening LOL!!

Then they asked me to decide fast whether to go home or not. At first my dicision was made > I'm going to Pionner mall mac.
But Shahlis and Noh talked me into going home. Cuz they cared for me, afraid as it'll be super dark and its alrdy 12am.
So I decided to go home.

-End of my day.. I ate maggi noodles when I got home used comp for awhile, Geokmei chat with me, asking about why doing MJ flashmob and stuff. Stressed out again, everything was left to me and Yat.

All I want to say is I hope Alim will accept my sincere apology and be good budz like normal days.

.::JYIAN Night::. [21 / November / 2009]

2009-11-20T04:59:00.001-08:00

7.45am: Woke up, bath , dressed up and went to school to buy tickets for Jyian Night.
Nelly and I got free tickets, thanks to Jia Jin for asking.
8.30am: Got to buy tickets for Wilson. Unfortunately teachers happen to have meeting.
We decided to go JP for a hearty breakfast.
There wouldn't be a better and meaningful time talking random things with friend.
10.10am:We went back to school for tickets, and got it. Chill around bench area, saw Sue, Jiliah practicing for Malay Dance.

12.16pm: We decicded to head home and to meet at JP Long John Silver for our Early dinner at 3.30pm.

3.45pm: We all gathered, Grace, Jia Jin, Rasyduh and I. Ate, talked, Grace kept laughing for no reason since this morning.

4.50pm: Went back to school to get 3 extra tickets for Nelly. Reached at 5.14pm.

5.25pm: Met Nelly and Syaheera. Almost all guys dressed formal. Was worried at first.

8.30pm: Right after performance, headed straight home with Nelly after taking a group photo.

8.45pm: Reached home. Found out I was alone..

.::Why do I believe its 2012::. (17 / November / 2009)

2009-11-17T02:10:00.001-08:00

Okay, as you didn't know, this blog entry post will be about facts and informations I found out in yahoo, and Youtube. Though some of you might be disagreeing with me.

Lets move on.

Earth, Planets, Mysterious stones formed on earth? Perhaps?
No one 100% Sure who made it or how did it formed. Do you really want to know?

But that not what I'm trying to explain here.

I'm sure many of you have heard the Y2K [Year 2000/01/01 00:00:01am] when the whole world will stop and stuff like that or a global computer error crash.

Did it happened? NO!! Well, started from that time, I didn't believe anymore to anyone's story until I found out these informations.

The year.. 2012
December 21st.

You might be thinking now that I'm just probably bored, come out with stuff to fool you guys out and get all freaked out and get engross into this subject. It might be surprising for some of you.

However, its not surprising to NASA and Governments.

Why? Because they knew this since 1983..

Lets see who also predicted and warned us about 2012..

Nostradamus:"A big object heading to our planet, it will reach by 2012 but it won't hit us."

Albert Einstein warned us about Pole Shift and during that we will suffer.

Mayan Prophecy. The Mayans knew about this Thousand years ago..

Calculating by their "The Tzolkin, or Mayan Sacred Calendar"that 2012 is the end-point. 2012 is when the Earth will complete it's Great Cycle.

The Holy Bible warn us about 2012 too. There's a diagram, but I'm lazy to copy and paste it.

There are so many people..

. So many other scientist..

. So many other Religions..

. So many other ancient signs and drawings about it..

. And they all..

. Pointing at that date..

. The Year 2012 December 21st.....

This, should be it, don't give up excuses like, nahh, maybe they just cocked it up.

Well, don't tell me the Mayans which lives centries ago did these things.

. .::Why::.

Why are they so sure that this all happen in 2012. If this is so true and important then why don't they tell to the public or this is too true that they don't want to scare the public?

Are they afraid they cannot evacuate everyone on earth that's why their trying to hide this away from us? Or are they having plans, like in the movies, only the riches which contributes to their project are able to on board. Leaving the poors behind to perish along with Earth's core.

Is this why they are so hurry to find another life on other planet? Like Mars for example.

Why is there so much evidence today about 2012.

This might sound fake if this information hit the world today or years ago. But thousands of years ago this was already known.

Will we survive 2012? That is the question of every human race.

And now this is where I'm going to share what NASA Secret is from 1983.

In 1982 NASA recognized the possibility of an extra solar planet.

1983 NASA Launched the IRAS (Infrared Astronomical Satellite) which locate a very large object, the size of Jupiter.

This looks like this 1st is the Dark Star (Brown Dwarf) this Dark star has 5 minor planets, the 6th as Earth, 7th one is what they call Nibiru.

Ancients believe 6th planet is much like Earth and is the Home for Annunaki "Giants or Gods of Old"live.

So year 2012 is when the Planet Nibiru will cut through our Solar System and pass between Sun and Earth. So its like a cross-section of solar systems.

This happening every 3600 Year, and possible this caused the Atlantis sinking and Noah's Flood and this will happen in late of 2012. The year 2012 is actually the year where its 3600 years before it happen the previous time.

Why don't we know about Stonehenge or Easter Island? Maybe the people before us built that and too, suffer the coming of Nibiru.

It is said that Nibiru will be seen by an eye on May 15, 2009 as a reddish object. It will be moving up so thats the only time we'll see it from the very Southern location of Earth.

And by May 2011, Nibiru can be viewed by all Earth links. Nibiru will pass through the Ecpliptic plane and will look like an imitation of sun (two Suns) around the size of our moon.

. .::Let progression take place::.

Thats when the Earthquakes and global weather.

But the worse one will be on Febuary 14, 2013 when Earth will move between Nibiru and the Sun. The Pole Shifting process and the Earth reformation will take place.

Thats when we'll suffer the most.

Earth will stop it's rotation for 3 days

As the effect, Hard EarthQuakes and Tsunamis world wide will take place.

Land will crack into pieces like how you see in the movie 2012 because of Earth's core hitting up.

Raging Volcanos around the land will erupt

And the Earth will be reforming slowly.

By July 1, 2014 the Nibiru will no longer affect earth and move away from our Solar System.

NASA knows about this, but didn't spread the word.

Terrifying news?

NASA reported that 2/3 of Earth's population will not survive this.

Soon, it'll be all over again.

01/01/0001

Are you prepared?

.::Back to normal::. (17 / November / 2009)

2009-11-16T19:23:00.000-08:00

Another day.
Just 'seems to be a burden to me right now.
Facing the same old routine
Just makes it so lifeless.
I want to go back to the old days.
Hanging out with my friends,
Playing all sorts of crazy stuff.
Doing stupid things.

I'm still quite confused though.
Didn't know what I did that made that lost.
I guess friends would just dissappear once in a moment,
And I guess its now my turn.

.::Once again::. (16 / November / 2009)

2009-11-16T04:45:00.001-08:00

On second thought, I guess I might have over reacted on that little situation.
Maybe... Maybe not?
I'm not sure of who is it to be at fault. Not sure when should it end..

Lets forget about that situation guys. Like my favourite line. Get over it, and move on.

.::Him again::. (16 / November / 2009)

2009-11-16T03:04:00.001-08:00

Him again. Who? Him!
This morning, he text me asking me to do him a favour, if can't, nevermind.
Later evening, he called me. I answered the phone. Feeling that he's sure gonna have a request from me.
EH SHAWN, can do m a favour anort?
Me: Yea, I guess, What?
E: Can come and work or not?
Me: Nah, don't want to. I still have events going on.
E:Why not you just take off tt day then you can work alrdy what.
Me: Nah, I prefer not too, moreover got tuition from my sis.
E: Call her to cancel la, since you don't want tuition.
Me: Don't want la. (Why rejected? Cuz super inconvenient.)
E: Come la please, Why don't want to work? Got me and Calvin you don't wanna work.
Me:I just don't want.
E: WAH LAO, you 16 years old alrdy still dont wanna work. Still stay at home play play play.
E: Ahya forget it bye.
Me:bye---- Line dead...

Âbove the situation^

Hey common, if you want to ask people to come over your work place, REQUEST PROPERLY EVEN THOUGH YOU GET REJECTED. I don't see how he is going to survive in the economy world.. Its full of rejections.. You just gotta try over and over again.

Shall I tell you whats going on in my schedule?
My tuition starts this early November already. My sis needs money, she prefers to earn it than taking from her parents without doing anything, somehow.. She feels that now its the time for her to slowly withdraw from taking her parents weekly allowance.
Moreover, by tuitioning me, I gain knowledge right? Better prepared for the future, although I admit I don't really like tuition. But now, she's tutoring me Mandrin, its actually more for my upcoming work on December IT fair at Expo. I learn, she learn, we all benefit.

Not only tuitioning is happening.
Flashmob events.. Plannings, Rehearsal, actual day event, borrowing of speakers, confirmation of participants, coming out with appointment dates so everyone is able to attend on that day.

And hE asked me to just abs myself on that day? LOOK MAN. I've quite a lot of stuff. How the hell you want me to cock up so many MC, its going to be costly.

Just because he needs work at help. The way he request, didn't change at all.
Just so as I thought that going out to work, out in the economy would change one..
Unfortunately, it didn't change him a single bit.

In a few months time after he quits his job, I bet his gonna go back to that shop and request for a 50 @ cash Maple card.

Nothing has changed. I bet he'll go around telling everyone that, nah, Shawn don't want to work, he rather stay at home to play computer.

I know, some of you might disagree.

Why did I right this down in my entry post? Cuz it just doesn't feel right not to do it.
Thats why I did it.
Just like Nike's quote "Just do it". <<< Out of point, I'm aware of it.

.::Review of Movie 2012::.

2009-11-16T03:00:00.001-08:00

Awesome movie!
Has action pack from beginning till the end.
Almost a 3 hours movie.
Great graphic.
Involves a lot of people.
Makes you feel like you're in it, no kidding.
View of each worse scenerio you could be in.

My ratings? 9/10!

.::Something Amiss::. (10 / Nov / 2009)

2009-11-09T21:54:00.000-08:00

Hey guys, I didn't update my blog for a long time.
What happened? We had an amazing Flashmob on 31st OCT, it was hella fun.
We did as many as we could. Do check out the vids at youtube. Search sinnerexify (Camera credit goes to Jia Jin.)
After that, had a family vaccation, on board the Cruise on 6th Nov till 9 Nov, took around 200+ pics I think! I will post it on either facebook or here. Depending on when I get the pics and transfer it to my comp.
But now.. Something is strange, had changed, it isn't what it seems like.
Since I've been back from Cruise, Nelly don't seem all that well.
I wonder if she's alright. Maybe there are certain issues that should not be shared.
Common Nelly, just give me a clue, whats troubling you?
And I'm sorry I couldn't make it for 'The Quest'on 21st NOV, couldn't over talk my mom this time. Moreover, my aunties were at my house. Shoot! I can't let my rage get over me.
Respect, respect respect.
Yea, so now I'm in this state of confusion. Why, where, how, whom?

And then at 12.15pm, checked the inbox of face book. Nelly said she might not be able to turn up for the upcoming flashmob. Whoa, that struck me. Don't know why such a big impact. But, was quite dissapointed I must say. I shall not persist on you coming, if there's a real situation going on, I would understand for sure (:

A message for my Best Friend over 14 years continuously:
Dear Nelly, if there's anything troubling you, or your having a distress in your mind. Talk to me! I'm always here for you. I know, WE KNOW, your living soon. The more you shouldn't keep everything to yourself. You should share and just burst everything out once and for all, clear your doubts, misunderstandings, misses, and loves. And with that, you'll leave with nothing that is unsolved. Clear the bottle you've kept inside of you for 4 years Nelly. Our friends, and I, we'll all lend you a shoulder, be your ear listener, go through thick and thins with you..
Don't forget, you have a lot of amazing friends out there...

We're blessed to have a friend like you.. Nelly Natalia Andin-

.::OH YEA!::. (27 / OCT/ 2009)

2009-10-28T08:28:00.001-07:00

Our Thrill The World Event had turned out in "Today's" News Paper!
Here's the link!http://imcms2.mediacorp.sg/CMSFileserver/documents/006/pdf/20091028/2810HNL013.pdf

Enjoy reading!!
Spot me inside!

.::Nightmare / Premination / Coincidence???::. 27/OCT/2009

2009-10-27T19:52:00.000-07:00

Sigh, this morning I dreamt of taking my N levels result back again.
Its something like there's a mistake of giving back result slips. So in the end, there's a swap. Something like that. I'm not sure how it happened.

But before I dreamt of that, I dreamt that Noh asked me: Shawn, gotten your results slip back yet?
I said: No, isn't it released on the first week of DEC?
Noh: No, we all got back our results already.
I: So how much is your score?
Noh: I pass! 16.
I : What about Nelly?
Noh : Yeah, she passed too.
-That was it-My dream stopped there-

Why did I write about this? Its because it didn't happen only one time. It happened 6 times in ONE month.
Normally I don't think of anything when I'm going to sleep. (<But now. even when I'm not thinking anything, it just appears in my dreams.)

Okay, I'll tell you what
I dreamt. One of my dreams was getting 15 points back.
The other? Was getting 22 points.
Whats it telling me. I ponder. Nah, maybe its just a dream. OR, it could be something is hinting me.

You see, how dreams work is the moment you sleep. What last thoughts that you thought and imagine of (and I meant the very last tip top peak that you think of before you doze of into your sleep), would appear in your dreams. However, if your thinking is just a vid vid imagination, its not going to happen. So it must be like a-wanna-do or your thinking of it badly then it happens.

And in certain dreams, you see yourself, you might not, maybe you see some other people that you didn't think off very long ago.

=How does dreams continue its own 'story-
Okay, when the dreams appear, garuntee that there is a commotion or something thats moving or there's action right? So you would be thinking a solution or either thinking: Hey! it looks like him! THE MOMENT you thought of that, it appears! And yes, it goes on like that until someone in reality disturbs you. Or your mind is dead tired and stopped thinking, thats when your dream ends.

You might have 2 dreams in a night. Well, I'm not sure how it happens because I don't experience it. But I DO have dreams that are like continuous dreams. For example: Having to complete carrying a haddle sack to another place which is a few miles from where I was standing. The scenario was like Egypt, me pushing a trishore (Don't know how to spell. Fuck off spelling bees.) My dreamt stopped, and instantly I remembered I didn't finish my job. I went back to sleep and dreamt of that AGAIN(with no intention). For a repeptitive dream, I dreamt it for 2 days straight. WEIRD huh?!

This? I can't explain too. But I only know how it works.

Our mind is just so complicated. Studying it is one way to concure it.
Studying your mind helps you to controll yourself, and of course, helps you in certain ways.

So all in all. Lets sum up the question eh. Was that something thats just a dream, maybe I wasn't aware of what I was thinking, or maybe its a hint of my'"future".

FYI: I don't think of results during my mid holidays. -.- _l_ dreams ok...

.::Thrill The World::. 25/OCT/2009

2009-10-27T01:02:00.000-07:00

Today's the day where all MJ fans gathered to pay a tribute to Michael.
I woke up at 4.45am. got prepared and met Nelly at 5.10am.
Waited for bus for like 10 min and reallised bus starts operating only at 6am.
So we walked to there.
Later on at train station, waited for 10 mins or so. Saw JJ, Met us.
He took out pics and recorded the dance we did at the event. Thanks JJ.
When reached, we rehearsed once, and later got prepared and dressed up for the event.
Then, the real thing starts. It was seriously an amazing experience. It was too fun then.
Later on did I reallise that everyone's are having their own programmes after that.
Shucks! Wanted to do more. The day doesn't end right!
Moreover, majority were tired.
I don't know why but I don't feel as tired.
I still felt my presence of energy. Burning, waking up, wanting to do it more at random places!

Yes, got to understand some of them having programms like working, O levels and stuff like that.

Nelly, Yat, and I decided to chill a bit more before heading home. We all think like wise.
But as time goes by, our speech became monotone. Numb. Restless. Tired... Dropped.......

Yea, after having drinks at Banquet at Jurong Point, we headed home. And thats about it!
So early! Sigh.

I'm just looking forward to this coming Saturday's Flashmob at Night Safari.
Hope to see supports from you guys there!

Btw, sorry for not uploading pics and vids. Tried to, but the more I try, the more I messed up my blog. Do drop by Nelly's blog. She has a few pics and vids. :)

.::Prep Flashmob::. [21/October/2009]

2009-10-21T02:49:00.000-07:00

Yo! Didn't update recently again. Haha.
These few days had been practicing Thriller dance moves with Nelly and 2 other friends, Hidayat & Herina (New met friends since Beat It flashmob).
Well, this dance lasted about 5 mins or so while beat it last for a min.
It's quite hard at first, but with the steps and guidiance by Nelly and Yat, we got it fast in 2 days!
2 days as in with the cue music (cue: Thriller song + a women's voice saying the dance steps).
However, we're still not sure of what's the sequence ahead. Hard I tell ya.

Motivating myself: Common, this is only basics.
Thats pushed me real hard into working hard for it.

So this coming Sunday 25/Oct/2009: Catch us at.. ermm.. Shucks. I don't know. But it'll be on TV!!
The following Saturday 31st Oct/2009 will be at Night Safari Entrance I think. So come see us!

-Pay Tribute To Michael Aint enough-

.::Finally-Venturing::. 17/OCT/2009

2009-10-17T08:20:00.001-07:00

Hey, sorry to all that have been longing for my updates.
Its over N levels, finally! The moment we've been waiting for.

Its time to do what we wanted right? Thats what I expected.
But, it seems everyones working for money.
Well, good for them.

Whats up for me?
What I've been persuading for is to learn Hip Hop. And thats what I've been longing for 3 years.
Now I've finally found someone who is more than happy to teach me. Nabila![4A2]
Thanks Nabila. Thats what I needed. I couch who is experienced in dancing, and someone I know.

Today, 17 October 2009. Could hardly forget this very day.
Well, I met Nelly around 5pm, and went to Esplanade Underground for the dance rehearsal on the upcoming Flashmob event which is on 25 Oct and 31 Oct.
Well, places would be updated soon for confirmation. For those who wants to join, do tell me via MSN or SMS.

Yea, after trying to catch up the dance moves, felt quite foolish in the process as it was the first time. Participants were enthusiastic, as well as Nelly and Hidayat! It was super fun learning new moves that would actually last much longer, be on record books and might be on telecast.

Not long after around 8+pm, we were dismissed. Went to Mac for dinner.
What happen was, we were talking, discussing about what to do, dress and wear to the event.
Suddenly, BONG! A late 30s guy banged on the Mac door. Slammed right in the face. Immediately, all attention, in and out doors averted their eyes to him. SOOOOO embarrassing!
Was shit funny when the guy behind him laughed his head off. SUPER LOUD.

We controlled our laughter.. And burst out laughing when he's not visible.
We all started saying if I/you were him, I would surely laugh super loud.
We then started saying if there's another one, it would make our day. End up, another girl slammed her face on the door. This time, tears ran down our eyes. FIRST TIME, its the purpose of joy.

Nelly started to take handphone and take a video. But no one had that incident since.
Right after she gave up hope. WANK! The LOUDEST sound I ever heard. A guy who is in his 50s slammed his face against the door. And I tell ya, the door is super oily with 3 people slamming their face on the door.

When we heard the super loud commotion. Nelly immediately shoutted OUH!!!!!! Then she covered her mouth. Hidayat stopped eating his burger and looked down. I bite on my straw and freezed, looking at my cup. We all started giggling, this time, we couldn't control. We burst out laughing. Shit, I felt some what cruel LOL. But it's worth while! Super hilarious. Follow up, we wanted to see more, however only 2 girls ALMOST hit the door, but didn't.

I guess girls are more conscious than guys. LOL. We gave up taping when we saw the 3rd guy who banged against the glass door complaining to the manager that HE shoul put a tape on the door so people would be able to see it.
Giving excuse that he was the one who didn't see it and there's a BIG BIG SILVER LONG HANDLE BAR on the door, he said that children might get hurt. Whatever...................

We gave up since then, Nelly had to rush home though. But suddenly she got all hyped up after eating Mac, maybe because coke has too much sugar in it! Just kiding....
Yes, she took some cool, weird, funny, emo, photos on the way back to the MRT station.

Fun fun funtastic day it was. Good day mates!

.::Mistakes/Joy/Endless::. (2 / September / 2009)

2009-09-02T01:06:00.000-07:00

Long since I've updated my blog.
Guess it's dead for most of you.
Did enjoyed last sat 29th August Flashmob for M.J
Had a lot of fun..
And.. Embarrassing moment.
What was it?
Well, walked for a day. Legs, calf were screamin.
Had to cross a ledge, surrounded by near by bush.
I accidently tip-toed. 1 leg cramped.
There goes the other.
2 calf crammed.
Loss balanced. Pulled near by bush.<<< People thinking im crazy.
And then when unbalance for mere secods and finally, big boom into the bushes.
SO EMBARRASSING. Thanks Nelly for helping me.
Don't think I'll be able to get up without 2 girls (Shy) help.
Near by was a family dining. further down, were more people dining.
All looking at me as I tried to get up.
Grr. Wish I hadn't been there.
But didn't regret doing the last m.j flashmob with the people I just met. Was very fun.
Also, met a few other Friends :)
They were nice! Fun! Ethu into MJ flashmob dance!
That's what I like about these people in Singapore. Rarely able to find em ^^
Well, of course I treasure my school mates too. They are the majorities I hang out with.

Now, in a state of regret. Not for going to Last Sat's Flash.
But regretted not starting out earlier.
In retrospect, I shouldn't have listen to people's negative remarks about me not able to pass N levels.
Because.. Oh well, I started late. And they think that I wouldn't have hope.
With much discouragement, didn't have the mood to focus on studies.
I tried, and failed/
Reminisced a guy who tried inventing light bulbs.
Failed a million times.
And some how, he finally discovered the beauty of light before he died.
Now, back to reality.
Trying doesn't hurt. But the matter of fact is the lack of time.
Not making pass N levels is a big thing for my family and me.
Shucks. I im here now updating my blog.

Sigh.
When will this ever end. When will joy come. Why do I have to pass this procedure before meeting the economic world!!!
Lols. I'm talking a lil outta point.
Yes, I know how to differenciate what's right, what's wrong.
I know how to calculate. Draw, apply basic knowledge.
I mean why does the Government have to make the criteria harder.
Last year was to focus of 3 subs,
Now, 5.
Whats next?
New subs?
Can't wait to see the future generations peeling and pulling of each other's hair.
Maybe they do it in a more educated way.
That will be the future trend. HAHA.
K. Out of point again.
Imma stop talking shit.'
FYI, won't be updating blog daily. Busy psycoing my mental self.<< If there's sucha word.

.::Long since update::. (26/ August/ 2009)

2009-08-26T06:33:00.000-07:00

Okay, I know its quite a long period since I've update my blog.
Cuz there nothing much.
Today, Absent from school.
I found school useless.
Enlgish, PE, Geog, MT, Math. << English useless, MT useless, Math revision moreover gotta stay back after school? Geog, 1 period useless.
I would rather take my tim to study @ home.
But didn't turn out as weel than I expected.
Why?
Morning woke up @ 11.30am.
Went on computer, maybe relax for awhile.
Reallised Evan didn't go.
Later played comp for awhile till 3pm
Went to meet Evan, Einstein to JE Liabrary,
Evan. Couldn't make up his mind to buy a bible book or not. in 1 hand, afraid that his mom would scold. The other, he want to read it so badly.
Been bragging fwith it for quite long. A lil paranoid.
Later, sed go to the corner study. He didn't want. But there's a table infront of us which is occupied, if they go we can have the tale to ourselves right?
He didn't want. He suggested going into a corner, cornered by book shelves. Great idea?
Went there. Later on, not long. He suggested going to a near by window just 2 book shelves away.
I didn't want, was inconvinient. Took out my stuff and was well-prepared alrdy.
When I studied, he said: Don't study leh!
Like 3 times.

Didn't cared. was aiming to finish a chapter today.
ihe bought quite cool pencil box anyway.
Later on coul;dn't take it. I wanna go mac ince I'm hungry. didn't ate dinner.
He suggested going to buy bible book.
End up didn't buy. Waste of time!
Went to mac, Couldn't concentrate. Kept talking.
After that Evan went of to join his family for dinner.
Along with Einstein. Both talked about hacks.
Had some laughed and back to studying for like an hour.
He suggested going to toilet then go buy thumbdrive for ZQ then go library.
Ended up wasted all the time today. Should have went to school.

So wasted. But I doubt it would be any help if I go to school.
Don't you think teachers are a lil but inconsiderate?
Main subjects are coming. English, MT and SS.
SS big problem. So many theory, history, writing stuff.
Then they expect us to do all their stuff.
COME ON. We don't stay up for 24 hours.
We need proper break, proper rest.
Life isn't balance.
Who's on duty to restore the balance in the world?
I ponder..
Audible Sigh..

.::Struggling in Life::. (21 / August / 2009)

2009-08-21T03:48:00.000-07:00

Ask me. How 's my day.
Bad.
Why?
I think everyone is losing patients on me. Perhaps, giving up hope on me?
What happened?
Plenty to talk about. So much that this post can be comparable with 1-31 July post.
Okay..
I'll tell u a bit.
Today..
Tuitor came my house. Didn't know why she looked a lil glummy.
The first time ever she was so frustrated on me. Cuz I didn't answer the question.
She wants ans desperately. I'm finding it! I'm finding it!
Sometimes, I just don't get the question, or uds the question. Applies to the passage as well.
What can I do. Can't check dictionary, not allowed.
Yes, its a practice. DUH. I know that.
Give me more time!
You know pressure plays a part too?
When people look at me, I tend to screw things up. I can't even handle things well when 1 person avert his/ her attention to me.
Buffled, confused. Its a perplexed situation that I can never explain.

Yea, reminisced what Nelly did. Was a funny thought though. The tuitor didn't treat her well. So, she did the same thing.
Yep, I followed her. I didn't treat her good. Pulled a long face.
Was thinking "You better treat me right. Or else say goodbye to your job." Though I know that she hae other kids to tuitor. [That's one good think bout being a tuitor. You'll never be jobless if you have a good qualification cert.]
I gave her thoe kinda glummy look. Lower tone till it's hell boring.
Hoping she was scared? Nah, fat hope. The situation worsened.

Yes. I beat around the bush all the time. I just can't tell someone if I hate him or her face to face. All my life, I've been either beating around the bush, forgiving / forget, or just simply walking away, having to say sorry in the end.

Never a reciprocal in life.

Thats why I hope to change and get my education right.

On second thought. Treating my friends mean is worth of your edu.?

Another bubble: Being straight forward doesn't mean that you have to be bad, mean, disgusting. Shit-like-fuck. [<< Don't ask me how I came out with this]

Once again, lost in more than just 1 way.

Nowadays, irritated by little noises, itchiness. Scratching myself to ease the itchiness was the normal think to do. But I would scratch till I feel the pain, till it's red, to ensure that there won't be that itchiness occuring at that spot ever again in my life. Thats how irritated and petty I was.

What's gotten into me? I don't know. My studies? Ain't doing well.

My sister. Ain't giving me the attention that was like before.
People say: You sure will pass one la. Sure score below 15 point one la.

Anything can happen if something goes wrong in your way.
Its like a car accident. Without awareness of surroundings, there goes your life, family, relatives, friends.

Just like now. Though its not as serious. Okay maybe, decides whether to pay school fees for another extra 1 year and waste 1 year of my life learning, experiencing all the same shit tht I had again. OR. Be promoted, elited by my achievement.

Once again. This sentence seems to appear very often.

So much to worry, so many to cater, so much to think, so many to fear, so many issues.
Endless.

The world. Creates all positive thing. Good, Happy, Yes, Satified, Enjoy, Joy, Positive, Love.
But some people came up with words that are opposite. Maybe through the theory of North and South pole?
Meaning, there's good. That means there sure must be an opposite meaning of that.
Bad.. That's how it came out? Maybe. Wild guess.
Soon, Bad, Sad, no, not satisfied, Negative, Hate came about.

The more I write. The more depression fills me.
I shall stop writing.

.::6pm-10.30pm::. (19 / August / 2009)

2009-08-19T07:59:00.000-07:00

Okay. Was very fun this night.
Firstly, got to wear my new pair of sneakers.
Second, Get to meet Nelly, Shahlis, Noh, Wilson and Alim.
Thirdly. After studying @ night class. Seperated with Alim and the group. Wasn't pleasant though ):
Later on. Nelly, comfort Fariha. I don't know what happened. So I just kept smiling, hoping things would be much better with my charming smile. JOKING.
Then, suddenly, felt a flatter on my right leg. I jerked my right leg. didn't care to see what it was. Then the feelin went to my left leg.
Was like in a flash of freel you know. Thought it was a butterfly.
Guess what..
.
.
.
I jerked my left leg hard and it went under the bright lights.
Then I reallise it was a 4cm long cocroach!
SHIT! Lucky when it was on my leg I couldn't see. Didn't use my hand to swipe it off as well.
It was dark. Couldn't see as well.
If not I would shriek like there's no tmr.

PHEW!

Then before heading to my house, Me and Nelly had a very fun time tgt~!
We practiced and dance to the beat off 'Beat it' by MJ.
WHOOOO!!!!!!! That's what I wanted to do all along!!

Yea. Dance for like 30 min or so.
And headed home. Passer-by kept looking. Then I took my phone out and act as if I was picking up a call.
LOL!
Nelly kept Laughing!
Yea.. I love having fun like that. Doing what you love to do.
Having your friends by ur side enjoying it as well.

Okay. Thats all man! Heading for an episode of Bleach and Imma hit the sack.
Night yall!

.::8.00am - 5.10pm::. (19 / August / 2009)

2009-08-19T02:09:00.000-07:00

Aw man. Closest friends never came to school today!?
Shahlis, Nelly, Evan. Lucky got Noh haha.

Man. today was very tiresome. I couldn't help but close my eyes for a few seconds. But the rusty voice of Miss Ng just grasp my attention.
Didn't do much for Math, and math remedial as well.

During lesson. Mr.Ee discussed about having own class performance?
Argh, my idea/ plan. Do not think that he likes it. Just care to share to the class thats all.

Besides, got told from Mrs.Hon to not to do FlashMob again.
Shouldn't have spread.
And Zi Qing shouldn't have post in forum! Goddammit!!!!
My plan, my wish for once a year.
Just vanish. We're not gonna do flashmob on teacher's day. Shucks.
Thought it would be something different.

If only I can get all attention and get all my classmates to listen to me, then there might still be hope.
Too bad. I don't posses that kinda 'power' you know?

Wanted to do for something for the teachers after 4 years of my life.
But, I don't think I'm able to.
Mr.Ee just took out a piece of paper and wrote down each and everyone's 'good at' points.

I reallise. I was known in for Art only.
Saddening isn't it.
So boring. Can't do anything, Can't make the audience go wow for long as well.

Hello!? Okay, share with you guys something. I wanna sing and join dance crew! nNah, they wouldn't accept me. Know nothing much about them as well.
Since I saw Jabbawockiez and all the MJ's tribute and dance. Inspires me a lot. Its like a boost of inspiration!

Ever since, I had been craving to join any hip hop crew and sang @ home when there's no one at home.
I'm just afraid getting bad comments, kinda embarrasing yea.
Its like after watching all the American idol/ Singapore idol. Some people sing and they think that they sang well.
For some reason, I think I'm that kinda person.
Maybe I should get a webcam or something to record my voice down.
Recording in phone doesn't work for me x=
Didn't turn out well.

Yea, dancing? Wow. Have been watching people dance through Youtube. Admiring them.
Gah! So many things I wanna try after my N levels.

All these goals are just unstoppable.
I gonna pick up lessons 1 by 1.

Anyway, in school today, Alim didn't seem happy. In wonder what happened? Care to share? :)
If u don't think it's convinient THEN FORGET IT!
Joking. If you don't think it's convinient then I'm perfectly okay with it.

Cya! Gotta prepare for night class. Strenuous.

.::Typical Day::. (18 / August/ 2009)

2009-08-18T08:14:00.000-07:00

Uhm, well, didn't attend school because I didn't want to?
Attitude man! haha!

Nah, I reallised that school has too many distractions.. Too many problems.
Staying home or going else where besides school to study or for revision is better.

Besides, Its revision week. Not much to miss in class am I right?

Yea, did study.. Well, missed my friends ):
Especially didn't attend night study class. Man! TT

Today went out at 12+ for Breakfast @ Long John @ JP with my sister and Mom.
After that went to StarBucks a study till 5pm+
Not much went into my head though.
^Went to eat dinner with My whole family.
Met up with dad and elder sis.

After that, went watch 'Where got ghost?' cinema film.
Was very funny :)
Long time didn't have this kinda family outting together.
Miss those times..

After that went to Converse shop to buy sneakers?
Yes! My first sneakers! Cost bout 65 bucks man! Okay.. It's kinda cheap over there.
Other shoes are like 100 ucks or so.

Yea, then went home and reallised that I didn't do my math work paper 2 year 2001.

Did till this timing and update my blog.

Nothing much about today. (:

Still, treasure a lot with Family and Friends.

Wonder what fun did I miss out today. Haha.

Thats all for today.
Nothing much happened.

But just wanna say, I wanna watch -Final Destination 4: Rest In pieces.
-The wind warriors 2
-The Avatar

And I wanna get -Snow Cap (Bean hat)
-New Pencil Case
-Bag.

Yes!!! Finally for 4 years I have the urge to buy stuff!
Okay, at least I have something to look forward in life now.

.::6pm-10.30pm::. (17 / August / 2009)

2009-08-17T07:30:00.000-07:00

Hi again, writing for the other half day of my day..

Well, basically it doesn't feel right today..
Something is wrong..
I don't know what it is..
But I just have a feeling that something is amiss.

Argh, first time seperated with my art groups.
Went flashmob with my Malay friends.
However, after being told not to do repeaedly because of gang issues.
We didn't really have the urge to do it from that time onwards.

During flashmob, kept failing.
Bad.
Failure.
Not cooperative.. Didn't freeze at the same time. Haha..
And partly I didn't have the momentum to freeze ):
I have a feeling that my head is hot, my hands are dam warm..

Nelly left not long ago.. Well, think her family needs her urgently or something (:
I understand. Haha..

After that, we tried 1 more feeze, But didn't turn out well as well..
Not all did it..
Okay for example Group A and Group B >>[Its not reffering to any names or anything, just an alpha example]

Group A froze, Group B didn't know, Group A saw Group didn't froze so they moved, Then Group B froze..

Haha, something like that. Well, should have gather everyone first! Shucks. Should have done it..
Anyway, was a fun night for me. Love being with my friends.. Enjoy the times.

I don't feel like attending school tomorrow, just have a feel that its going to be a same mundane routine..
Find it useless going to school, with all the distractions, I'm just wasting my time over there.

Yea.. thats all.. And Thanks Alim, for your post (: Thanks a lot.
Thanks to my dearest Nelly as well.. For explaining the factors.. :D

-I now believe smiles is a wonderful cover for anything..

.::I'm Sorry As Well::. (17/ August / 2009)

2009-08-17T01:46:00.000-07:00

I apologise to Alim, Wilson and Cynthia alright?
I'm sorry that saying he/ she made u ponder about it very long..

What my intensions were was to write it so that people who doesn't know or didn't hang out with us knew about this situation.. Cuz there are many others (which I'm sure) reading this now.

What I wanted to say today was that I didn't want to say names because I thought that it would be a bad impression for you guys, like you know after reading this, people might think wrongly of you guys.. And I don't want that to happen you see.

Yes, I didn't know tit was that cruelsome till it was backstabbing. I SWEAR I didn't know.

Well.. Wilson didn't seem happy to today..
I can see Alim's changes :)
I didn't want share that situation in blog because I scared that there would be misunderstandings.. I didn't know that you guys would like me being straight forward..

'To be truthful, I wasn't that kind of person.

Not all people like being told face to face you know..
So thats why I did it like that..

Wasn't meant to back stab you.

And of course I'm not afraid you beat me up or scold me after me telling you what I dislike about.

It was partly about just know what I've said and partly because is quite hard to express myself face to face with you guys..

And thats why I've created a Blog.. Easier to express.
Easier to confide in.
Easier to share.

Ya, if you know what I mean then I doubt that there would be any problems in our understandings. (:

I want us(Art) to be together forever.. Because we all have something in common. (:

Sorry if my he/ she typing methods were really .... mysterious? <<< Couldn't find a better word.

Well, thats allf or now.. gotta go for night study.. Cya!

.::Oh No!::. (15/ August/ 2009)

2009-08-15T07:47:00.000-07:00

NO! I missed my first chance of FlashMob with Singapore Mission! Argh! Shucks! Dam!

Messaged all contacts yesterday at 3am.. hehe..

Expected everyone to read when they wake up.. Yep, I know its lil too late.. Sorry!
And results? Yea la, expected, a lot never reply.. Haha..

Yea, I'm okay with it ^^ At least let em know whats happening?

Uds some prepaid low as well :)

Yea, JJ, Zi qing, Alex wanted to go.. But I didn't, Cuz they 1 by 1 Ask.
Thats why I thought only 1 person go, So I said nah, so less people we know go.. Besides it was around 1+pm, didnt have the time to reach there by the appointed time, 2.15pm @ Orchard MRT!

Yea, well... After this, went back to room. Study a lil for Math, did a few paper 1s.. Haha..

Couldn't concentrate though c[=

Bright, tempting, fascinating big flat screen infront of me..

HOW COULD I RESIST!?

And there it goes, another day wasted. Whole day played..

I wanna study!

Sister told me ure not gonna get As nor Bs at this rate..
Well, I couldn't do anything..

::Did You Know?::

Did you reallise that when you start gaming or serving on the net you'll be unable to stop?
Yes! Thats MY problem! Shucks man!!! Its just too fun..
Sigh.. ):

Anyway, besides this..

On the previous post bout the 2 "he" and a "she".
One of the "he" apologised to me :) Yea, I wasn't angry now, I forgive and forget after posting it.. Felt much betta..

And Nelly Nelly Nelly... Thanks a lot dearest! Thanks for posting advises on your blog :) And yes! I agree with you in many ways!

Haha, It helps to build and picked me up on the right way of thinking :) Thanks a million!

And thanks to all readers of my blog! Makes me feel happy that people notice my stuffs!

Haha..

And of course, Please do check out my friends blog :)!!

.::Youve over done it::. (14 / August / 2009)

2009-08-14T05:50:00.000-07:00

Yea.. you.. Since I reallised since Last Sunday when I wasn't able to join you guys, Suddenly I felt being treated cold, badly.
Yea, was feeling low at first.. Came to meet u guys up, thinking that it's sure gonna to be fun..
At first it was all right.. Till we reached our venue..
Don't know whats wrong sitting with her. Doing it once or twice is okay.. But doing it consequtively is quit far off.
Yea, though people say they like to joke, disturbed in a fun manner, I don't see how is it when its being repeated over time.
Not only her, but me. Was feeling bored, sitting at the corner. Needed some boost of energy by talking.
I approached.. Hey__ then there goes the famous word.. Shut Up la!
Okay..
Tried again..
Got the same reply
Tried 1 more
Got the same reply
Maybe I was sensitive, So tried again..
Same reply..

Ha, Aint funny.

Later on eating at Banquet, wanted to sit with one of em.. Maybe cuz I was sensitive..
::: I wann sit with him! ::: Ya, I wan sit with him also, you sit with her.

Seriously, that was the time when my mood was turned off. Yea, don't mind sharing.. But felt taken adv when someone didn't wanna sit with me but share food..

OKAY! You may say, we still sitting @ the same table right? So sensitive for what?

Ya, you can actually say nicely to me that you wanna sit with him.. But the problem is the tone, the gestures..
Jokess...

Maybe I was wrong, have a better explanation?

Well, I don't mind sitting with her, i enjoy sitting with her, and of course you guys as well. But I don't seem to be invited sitting with the both of you.

Thats why at that moment I was a lil bias against you guys than her..
Then you guys got the wrong idea of me being so nice to her? Well, remebered someone said: Wah, so nice to her then when I take you give black face (something like that).
Well, didn't wanna say anything that time, I didn't wanna embarrass you infront of people. I don't do it infront of friends, I will say jking la or smth after doing it, but I seldom.. EVEN WHEN I'M ON THE PHONE.. I talk NICELY. (It was a joke what)
Well, she joked with me, but she didn't joke until that extend.

Since that day, wasn't happy.. But still treated em as normal.. I don't like to be beaten, thrown at, or pinched: Im skinny, I'm human, I feel.

Yea, I'm sensitive in the inside.. I know, not like guy right. Guy should be tough and stuff like that.. Had a hard time coping physically, putting on and competing so that I wouldn't be looked down upon.

My truth? When I was young, doctor said that I had something in my stomach which digest foods. Resulting in a lack of protein, Calcium, everything that I ate, will partially taken..

Ya, I hate for being me, skinny people don't look pleasant at all, what they do has an impression of a girl? I wanna be FAT FAT FAT. LOL.. Ya, tried eating a lot.. doesn't help okay..

Yep2, there's plently more, I feel like a fucking alien.. But it's too personal, afraid that I'll be mocked once again.

Well, next day, wasn't pleasant at all, tried being normal, forgetting bout what happened the previous day thinking that maybe they were just high yesterday..

Same thing happened..

Third day, though it was a bit better, but was outta the topic. Went home my-self, tried to relate to the topic by playin same intrument as em.. Was hard.

Till today, still coping.. Hoping that it'll make it all better..

After reading this, please don't feel that: I shall not joke with Shawn anymore.. You see the reason why I post this today? Because on the other days I was afraid that You all might think this way.. But I doubt understanding friends would think like that.. Maybe friends who had experienced the same problem might uds too..

Well, after all these years.. don't think nice is all good and pretty from the responses I get..
Maybe I should change myself to a someone that is stronger and perhaps a lil mean to defend myself?

I can't use violence to solve problems.. So normally
I prefer to talk things out..
Fighting aint my type.. Im weak physically..
I know it.
You know it.
And that is why..

.::Mass Reminiscement:. (12 / August / 2009)

2009-08-12T07:46:00.000-07:00

Wow, didn't blog for 2 days.. seem dead by now..
For the past 2 days.. had been rushing through my Art Prep work..
There were a lot of last minute work done..
Well, I don't think it will turn out well...
Saz sed highest get C5.. Was like shit! Then how the hell imma go sec 5.. My goal for Art was like an A..
Man.. Everything just seems to go down like ure in a roller-coaster.. A long down track..
Well, as said, there's always an upside after it..

Why busy this few days? Well, basically did and used every time in the day to do art and night to study for the next subject thats tested on the next day..For Monday, I thank god that it wasn't Social Studies the next day.. Cuz I rushed like shit through my Art.. Though my art piece seems simple, its very time conuming.,.. SERIOUS! I have to shade everything one by one.. I can't just 1 whole time colour everything while try to tone it..

For the next day which is Tuesday, had Mother Tongue exam, had a hard time figuring out what does it mean and all.. Well, at least I felt that I used my time right.. I used up each and every minute that is available till time's up..After that I went straight to Art room and did all the things I could do.. Did tones of cuttings and pastings... And some last minute colouring... Hoping that I would get at least a B.. After that.. Just remembered that the next day is Social Studies examination.. Was like shit! Dam busy... Later on.. went eat KFC, don't really have mood, in the mean while tried cheering Wilson up as well, didn't know why he was upset though.. Oh yea.. thoughtful de Cynthia gave me, Wilson and Alim a peace of card. So sweet haha.. Didn't expect her to make for us.. :) And yes Alim! We have the coolest friends! You, Cynthia, Wilson as well as my dearest Nelly!!! I'll never forget u guys.. Gave me the best moments in my secondary school life.. Its cuz of Art thats why we all bonded so close ^^.. Thanks to Art and Night study programme.. haha.. Well, after that eat KFC went home.. Then tried study at least 1 chapter till 2am... Studied chapter 4 .. Sri Lanka.. Concentrated on that topic.. Hopefully would come out the next day..

UNFORTUNATELY, the paper came out Northen Ireland.. WTF MAN!!! So unlucky.. Not a SINGLE thing is on Sri Lanka.. GG man! My SS gonner.. Thinking of how to score dam high in Geography now..

Well, Today did the SS test, after that went of to slack and ate Mac at Pioneer mall with JJ, Alex, Wilson, Kevin, Alim, Einstein, Evan. Me, Einstein and Evan played the 1-99 guess number.. Punishment was to drink 100 plus + ketchup + BBQ sauce..
The taste is terrible.. The last thing that you wanna taste on Earth..
Dam sour sweet..
After this we all played True Or Dare and then later play Catching.. Was dam exhausted.. Don't know why..
Like becoming old.. Einstein also the same..
Haha... Then later they bought H2O and we shared...
Lied down and talked.. So relaxing but was very tired.. Somemore had stomach ache during that time.. Think was because of the Mix concoction i drank during the game in Mac..
After that went home..
Then was tired.. Took a nap.. Till 6+, no time for Night study,.. Wasn't even planning on going.. I know myself.. Even if I go I can't concentrate..
Was tired both physically and mentally..
Then later enough rest alrdy, went down with my sis.. My sis skate, I skate-board.. Dam bored.. Keep fail.. Can't balance.. LOL.. We both gave up.. went up to take badminton racket.. Went down and play.. Had few laughs then... Then saw time.. 8.30.. NOO! Singapore Idol! Went up to watch..
at 9pm, Came in dota 2 matches..

Basically today was kinda slack.. Lol, really had no mood to study.. perservered for 2 days.. lol..

Well, thats all for today.. Pretty much eh.. Haha..

Well guys, just wanna say thanks all for helping me, supporting me, making laughs and boring time till its fun and entertaining..
All please workhard towards your N levels and Prelims as well.. Please!!! I don't want to lose best friends like you guys.. :) WORK HARD!

.::Sudden Thoughts::.

2009-08-08T09:55:00.000-07:00

What's the purpose of a Flashmob to the audience?

To bring smiles on their mundane rountine life style.
To get them to avert their attention to you.
Must be impress so that they would clap for you.

Reminiscing about C and E:

It seems in class that E is doing very well, in track with everything.. Maybe even further..

Recalled that he told me he did something on purpose to demoralise people like me.. He said he would say the paper is easy after taking the test. So peeps like us would be so dumb and stupid to feel so pressured and into a what-to-do state.

Why? Why? Why..

Why am I talking like that.
Why am I gossiping behind his back?
Why can't I just leave him alone and ignore so that everything's gonna be alright?
Why I'm always end up sticking with him everytime when I know sometimes situations solved but was never reciprocal.

All these questions are just some questions that I'm unable to find the my ans to it.

E sed he doesn't like C.
Whilst C sed he doesn't like E..

Hmm... Confused once again.
Making use?
Trying hard to get close buddies for different purposes or what?

Humans arn't tools.

Maybe MY thinking is Naive.
Don't ask me why I think of E this way..
But I'm sure what happen during 4 years makes me think of him in a certain perspective.

It doesn't mean that his all bad.
I believe every peeps in e world have a good/ positive/ kind/ caring/ fun and loving side..

YES, he treats me good as a friend. But when I'm in a difficult position with him.. It's really unbearable.
I don't want to gossip anymore.. But I just want to tell someone NOT because of biasness towards E but its just like pressurised air in a Srynge that has been wanting to be released, but there's a thumb covering the hole. Its hard to comprehend, you know...

::Changed-Thats how it should be::

Alim told me that he don't want to hate anymore.. He found out himself that hatred is just a waste of time (qouted from Cynthia). Yea.. I find it true.. Very true..

I mean why live in a world full of hatred? You don't get any benefit from it.. Your just absorbing more negative thoughts and feelings and keep inside your heart. Its like sniffing glue.. Glue goes in but never comes out. Eventually, -dead-

We should live our lifes freely, want you want to do, don't let anyone stop you. For example, I've always been craving for Flashmob. Now, I'm doing plenty of it. Next, I'm aiming to learn dance, I wanna perform dance(Hip Hop) on stage. Just lack of a couch thats all. Then, in the mean while, I'll train my voice for singing.. Wanna sing like Chris Brown and Nickelback... Have 2 Vocals.

Call me crazy! I just love to do what I want to do..

No more hiding from outside world..

I'm not living my life with shyness.

.::Expected?::. (8/ August / 2009)

2009-08-08T09:20:00.000-07:00

Today was fun!

We did Flashmob at JP, Failed some anyways..

My hand kept shivering! My leg too! WTF!? <<< color="#ff0000"> bleed.

We did Flash first is at X craft shop. Attempted twice till the shop keeper clapped her hands and say what u all doing? haha. LOL

Later on froze a couple of time around the entrance to New jp on 2nd floor. Hand kept shaking again. Alim was looking @ my phone.. Then my hand kept shaking like it has it's life of it's own. Controlled laughter....

Then later went outside Jurong Point, Froze around the sqaure where random plantations where made. Sec 2 guy made a big fall before freezing. Me and Alex paired up. Kept giggling. Then stop for awhile.... Till his phone got stupid anime on the phone (Cuz our post was like boht of us looking at his phone). 2 stick man fighting.... Laughed.. I failed D: Felt dam stupid.. HAHA.

Later on we went to where the Bangala's are.. Where they normally hang out and park their bycicles... We went there and froze.. This time I tried posing as if I was tieing my shoe laces... THEN MY BODY LITERALLY SHAKE!.. WHOAT THE!!!! [I'm so fucking fragile.. LOL]

Right after freezing, we all pointed up @ the sky and peeps were all convinced!!!! So cool!

Later while heading to the park just over head the bridge. We all formed a single file and said hi simultaneously when there's people walking pass. <<<>

After this its kinda like public harrasment alrdy... LOL.. We kinda immitate those Bangalas sitting on the grass. Surround em and did what he do.

Some of em walked away...

Did a lot more but was kind of a harrasment...

But I ENJOYED!!

After Flashmob, I don't know why but I feel very down.. Maybe cuz Nelly's gone.. Or fun's over.. Or MAYBE 'L' left.........(NAH).. Joking! so bad.. haha

Me, Einstein, Alim, Wilson went to JP to eat Bonquet.. I was quiet all the while.. Didn't reallise I was like in a daze till Wilson questioned me.. Haha.. Tried to come out with something interesting or funny.. But I just couldn't.. My mind was all restless... Lazy.. Dead.. Killed..

Don't ask me why because neither do I know the answer to it...

After that we walked to the Library to do Art.. But found out that Library closed.. So went to Einstein house... Did a lil of a sketch.. Distracted by the Tv, Cuz it was showing Resident Evil !!!

Alim played guitar.. Room was air-conditioned. Condusive to study...

Others where doing 'something' haha... Not to mention it..

Later went home alone.. Didn't expect that to happen..

Met my sis.. went up lift then saw my Father came out..<<<>

In retrospect, I didn't think I would look so unnatural during the whole flashmob video.. So fucking sucks man my posting.. I don't know what else I can do to improve.. My head like sticking out man.. Some kinda nerd trying to do a Flashmob.. Cheahh....

.::Day of Reallisation- Its too late::. (7/ August / 2009)

2009-08-07T07:15:00.000-07:00

In the morning had National Day celebration. Alim kinda like emo in the mornin yea.. lol.
Anyways, mornin was dead-bored. I'dd kill myself than come to school.
Came to school just to take my prep work.
After that went to library with Wilson, Alim, Cynthia.
At first we concentrated on drawings.
However, got sec 5 peeps came to disturb Wilson. >>> Well, there's nothing to blame on Wilson, but em. I just think they need not made noises.
After that, had no mood to think, do, nor draw. My mind just went dead. >>> Cynthia brought up a point: We did too much on the past few weeks.
And we reallised that we are able to concentrate more when we're in Art room >>> That was the first time that I wanted to go back to school so BAD!
Anyway, we went to Bonquet for our dinner. And I was rather quiet BECAUSE the song Beat It kept repeating in my mind!!! Check out Alim's guitar playings! He''s awesome I tell ya!
Then they say I emo! LOL.. haha.. I was like, what!?!?!? I didn't even reallise I was being so emo.. LOL.
After that we went to playground near the library and waited for Kevin to meet us.
And now.... Was the funniest moment! Something happened to Cynthia when she was lying down on the net! Dam funny. I burst out laughing uncontrollably!
(I don't want to mention what happened! haha. Check out Alims and Cynthia's blog to see if they got put or not.)
Later I was tired.. Very tired.. Then Nelly called me.
I didn't expect her to leave so early....
I was extremely upset and depressed when I found out that she's gonna be a part from me.
I LOVE her as a friend. I treasure her in my heart. She's the one and only special friend that uds my backgrounds, thinkings and feelings.
How can I lose a friend like that!
A friend w'ho has been 16 years in your life, cheering you up, me cheering her up, comforting each other.
A friend that goes home with you in bus and leaves by the side of your block. >>> Its like going to a home where we stay.
A friend that has full of energy, loves to dance and sings....

I'll find a dam way to contact her every single time so that she wouldn't feel alone.

Guys... Though my life looks so much more unexperienced to the outside world.
I still know the feeling of being isolated by friends.

Nelly Nelly Nelly! I will make your day tmr when we do flashmob! We'll have the best fun! I'll try my best though!

.::Bad day::. (7/ august/ 2009)

2009-08-06T21:04:00.001-07:00

Argh man, today totally suck man. In the morning I woke up with a bad leg ach cramp on my calf. In the bus I felt dam tired and giddy, and also thinking about today's English paper how hard is it gonna be. Later in library where we took our exam. Dam cold. Air-con can freeze your mind alrdy, they still go turn on fan -.-" So it's like everytime the wind comes to you everything freezes. I rushed through my paper cuz I caouldn't see what time it was, What I saw was 10.30 end, then I left with 5 min. Scarely is 10.45-.-"wtf right? I rush through my paper, panic like hell, my hand shaking, plus the freezing room. Its unimaginable! After the paper, I kinda shag alrdy. Very tired. "All students of art in class of 4a2 please go to art room NOW." wHOA..... no break...... We all rush to art room and guess what. Mr.Baka mood swing, we did our glazing (By using a tool to "cover" it with another thick layer). Somemore we need to blow dam hard. And you know when you blow hard sometimes will giddy right!? Not yet, we were all under hot sun. woooo.
And Mr.Baka keep pestering us. Okay, after art, tired like hell, we rush to chemistry class which left 20min. After chem class we all went home bath then go back school till 9pm for art.. Shucks.D:

But later on at night was dam fun. We did flashmob and first time we hit a target of around 20+ people looking at us. Its like almost the whole kopitiam. We keep pointing towards the sky and act as if there's something over there. Then later on for a couple of minutes, 1 of us take pic using phone then say. CHEY, IS JUST THE MOON LA. HAHAHAHA. LOL!!!! Okay, tired gtg.

.::Strenuous Day::. (5/ August/ 2009)

2009-08-05T06:56:00.000-07:00

.::Strenuous Day::.

Argh man. Everything seems to cramp together once more. I'm having pressure over art and Prelim is just tmr! OMG! I haven't start revising anything for my subjects. I do notes but nothing went into my head. I admit, I envy people who can study and memorise fast like Einstein and Evan. Well, just now in bus, Evan told me he's going to study with Eintstein. I'm a gonner alrdy man. They 2 sure gonna share techniques on memorising and stuff. I'm sure this time round Evan's gonna win me. Not that I'm not happy for him. But it's like he's winning everything from me. He's very sociable, his physically stronger than me.. etc... And now, he's winning my studies, he told me he wanted to win me. I mean, shit man, why the hell you want to compare with me. Even if he wants it he shouldn't told me. Its like: I WANT to beat you in your class position.

I felt everything is taken from me. This is the first time I'm sitting into an examination without any guidiance or preperation before hand. It's really pressurising to know that your going to lose out, to know that you lack behind, to know that you arn't going to join all your buddies through next year. Man I don't know what to do. I don't think praying is going to help. Because my hope seems to be lost somewhere in pitch dark.

I'll talk no more. Hoping I'm able to cope with the prelim and hopefully to pass my N levels. Pray hard for me too.

All the best to all sec 4.

.::A Day of Dissapointment::. (4/ August/ 2009)

2009-08-04T07:20:00.000-07:00

It was a routine. Going to school, rush home for lunch and came out for night study right after a short 30 min break. Well, now I actually know what did my sis experiences are like. Well, must be wondering, why title: day of dissapointment? Actually, not much happened. But the impact was quite big (call me sensitive though). In Art lesson, Mr.Saz told us that at the current standard, there are going to be a lot of grade Cs and Bs. And the highest is mostly likely to be B4, I was like WTF~ I was planning to get Art an A2, Because only art is able to replace my grades for my Mother tongue! Dammit. Not only that which had saddened me and dropped my confidence level. There is more to it than just that, there is more things that happened to me which made a low self-esteem. I'll name one, everyday, as you guys know, I'm sitting at the back with Evan. Well, its not what your thinking now. Evan actually studied all the time and its kinda presurrising to see him study and then later close the book and shout out loud: OKAY, I'M DONE MEMORISING. TEST ME. And I did test him. HE REMEBERED EVERYTHING! At that point of time, I don't think I'm able to catch up with him anymore, because he had started way before now, I think he started like 2 months ago and he had 'mastered' Chemistry.
The feeling when your trying to study but you can't because you have a head ache, tired, stress, is very fucked up. It's undescribable (don't even know if I spelled it correctly or not), only people who are in this state right now knows what it's like. Man. After bottling all these feelings up, the stress, the pressure, the tiredness, sometimes I just feel like breaking down. But one thought that I always keep in mind is 'There are always people who are having MUCH MORE problems then me, compared to YOUR situation, it's nothing.'. Yeah, and it helps a lot. This is not the end actually.

::My Life::

It just feels like your being controlled, strings tied to your hand, and every single join that is neccessary for you to move is tied to a string. And who are manoeuvring? Most of it happens in school. Well, basically after school, some want to accompany friends, some wants to go home..[NOT reffering to Nelly!]
For example, I hang out with 'him'. We would always walk to the third bus stop or maybe walk home.. Often would be hanging out to eat before going home.. I don't mind those things actually. But the problem is, I have NO time because its kind of a rush for time and my house isn't near okay! Some friends just don't understand, some friends just wants it their way all the time. And when you don't do it their way, it's like going to be a cold war with almost the hold school. You would get lesser people coming towards you to talk, lesser people by your side, lesser people as your accompanion. Well I can't just say he did it on purpose to drag your closest buddies to his sides but it's kinda obvious. Ask other people who had experience war with him man! Provided if you know who is he.(don't want to mention name)

Well, when I get home, I'd like to rest, maybe play a match or 2 in Dota. But the first word that drills through my ears is: sleep early. It''s like COMMON man! Just got through a sick shit of school day, finally I'm able to distress myself and you want me to sleep? Btw, my bedtime's 11pm, and I normally reach home around 10+pm, so its like very less timing for me to enjoy myself you see.

And about today, man.. Managing friends are a real trouble man! What I meant was I don't know how to manage them to let them get along with each other. A doesn't like E, E does'nt like L, L doesn't like E as well, A doesn't like L as well. YOU SEE! **** right! Was looking forward to a flashmob today, but everyone doesn't seem to be in the mood. So we only did one, and it was very short. And btw, A won't do Flashmob when E is around. And I'd like A to be around cuz his very fun to be with and enthu as well! It's like we'd do it anytime anywhere. But E isn't that people, his a lil against Flashmob. Ah, I thought E would be around for today only, but tmr he would be too. So I guess tmr it would be the same thing. No one doing, boring day. Just feeling like hitting the hay now.

-Good boy> good life? Don't think so.-

Sharing and Flashmob day! (3/ aug/ 2009)

2009-08-03T07:34:00.000-07:00

Wow, today Me, Alim, Wilson and Cynthia shared a lot of stuffs! Promised not to mention it :) We chatted and had a great time, shared our songs and made sure everyone has a chance to share their favourite songs. Cool eh? How many friends would gather like that and share thought and feelings. And we also had FlashMob @ Central. We froze near the kopitiam, 7 eleven store which failed, but there was one when we froze at a big square just below Wilson's block. And we heard China people talking in mandrine: Wei sher moe tar men hui zher yang? <<>dam fun. But a few times weren't serious enough so its quite an embrrassment. But as times pass by, we got better and better. :) Well, tommorrow's matter.. I don't know how to settle, I have to try to manage Evan and JJ's sitting case position, matter about how to tell HER that I still gotta attend my Art as my submission day is this coming thursday, I have plently to do<>dissapoint her after postponing the day to visit her love one in hospital. Yet cancelling her History remedial on the next day just to wait for me to go with her. Argh! In addition I still have to arrange a date for my sis to tuitor me, she hasn't been free lately. And Prelims are starting on this Thursday! Wth! So fast. Shucks man.. I'm so stressed up now.. I don't know what to do. But still, I had a great time before coming on to summarise my day out. Thanks to Alim, Cynthia, Wilson, Alex, Kevin and Evon! They had some-what cooperated well in Flashmob. Hope we could do better on the next trip.

To a reminder for those people in 4a2, the next flashmob will be on this coming wednesday, we're gonna give a big shot by freezing at the canteen and 11.05 for about 30 seconds.
Please cooperate in order to succeed well in this flashmob. Don't blow this chance away by letting people think that flashmob is stupid and embaressing, it's a form of art yall!
Night!

::CREDITS AND THOUGHTS:: [2/ Aug/ 2009]

2009-08-01T20:41:00.000-07:00

::Appreciation::

Well, I'm sure you were guessing. Hey, why Shawn blog so nice/ Hey, how the hell he managed to do a blog so nice!? Well, the one behind all these +doings were NELLY! She helped me set up all these themes, setting videos up that I wanted. Ah, she's so kind and helpful :) I mean, which other friend would waste time to set up a blog when its not yours, and you don't get any credit for that as well. That was the moment when I started to think, how many real good friends I do have. Haha. So awesome. Okay, maybe besides Nelly, Alim and Regina might help me. Well, Alim did offer help but I don't want to bother so many people. Regina also did help me for the first few steps as well, thanks! Haha. And keeping my blog in a low profile is what I want. :D Thanks Nelly! Alim, and Regina! :)

::View Of Flashmob::

What DO YOU actually think about Flashmob?

Firstly, doing a flashmob with a class helps bond relationship, understanding and cooperating with each other better.
Helps to relieve your stress with all your friends by doing a fun activity.
Reason: we've been all working day and night to finish our project, I must say that these 3 weeks has been a strenuous week for those who had attended night study.
Helps us to be more open to each other.
Give teacher's and other classes a impression that we are +DIFFERENT, we are SPECIAL!(Giving a good impression always helps for anything.) -If they enjoy teaching our class, hopefully they would erm... give us more tips? Just think about it.
Flashmob is also a form of ART okay! So there's nothing to be shy about to do it in public!
Flashmob brings upon smile on people's face. But you can say that Singapore audience are lousier. Haha!
Its the time to show what you always wanted to do and show what you can do!
Contribute your ideas in the 'Talk trash Box'!

2nd Day ::Reminiscing:: [2/ Aug/ 2009]

2009-08-01T20:20:00.000-07:00

::Apology Accepted::

Well, what happened at yesterday's night was that someone who critised Flashmob had apologised to me after his family's consultant. LOL, I seriously didn't expect him to tell his whole family about it? Anyway, he apologised, so yea.. Once again I forgived him. I know what you guys are thinking man. Shawn! Why still forgive him after he bully you-- etc. Well, I forgived him because he sent me a long message of apology (which is the first time). Hence, I was quite convinced that he's sincere and serious about it.

::Flashmobs:: More, more, more!

Yea guys. Yesterday was really fun going out with Nelly, Jia jin, Alim, Ziqing. What I had planned was we study till night, and then later on do a flashmob. Well, you guys must be asking where? Of course we didn't do it at a place where there are lots of peeps. We basically aim 1 guy that we see on the street and froze infront of him. Well, there were few attempts. Most of it were a failure. HAHA. But there was 1 freeze part that I liked. We froze at the bus stop. And there was only us. So its like the whole area froze. Cool eh? Zi qing, Jia Jin and Alim saw a cyclist looking at us, taxi slowing down and stuff like that.. haha. I think we really pwn it man! Well done guys! Thanks for giving me such a great time. Oh yea, about the studying part. We didn't really managed to concentrate. LOL, because my main idea was to do flashmob after studying, was to excited not to think about it! Gahhh!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can you believe it? (31/7/2009)

2009-07-31T09:28:00.000-07:00

Wow man. Seriously fed up today. Here's what happened:

Today in class we did a Mini Flashmob involving our whole class 4A2.
Our target was Mr.Ee, Miss.Wong and Mr.Teo .
We had real fun then. Thought Miss Wong's remark was a lil dissapointing, you can call her a spoiler. Haha. For Mr.Ee's case, we stood frozen with different postures right after pledge taking. Then when we froze, Mr.Ee was shock, somemore he was like ''Alim~ (knocks on the table)Alim?". Was dam hilarious, then Jia Jin bursed out laughing, cuz he say he couldn't 'tahan' Mr.Ee''s facial expression. Haha. Then for Miss.Wong, after greeting her we froze. Then she say 'Ahya, seen this before la. You all carry on lor, I can wait.' Then we all started to feel stupid! Well, the nicest was Mr.Teo, once we started freezing. He took ot his phone and recorded it down. So embarrassing sial!

If you don't like the idea of Flashmob, then just STFU.

Common man, the reason why I talk about this and started this whole Flashmob idea with JJ is mainly because we work so hard and even stayed back late till night for our N level projects. So basically I just want everyone to have fun TOGETHER by doing something random. But some smart ass isn't as open as us. Some fucking guypiss me off. Here what we talked: Firstly, he saw my MSN pm nick saying that Flashmob will be on Sunday blah blah blah, all the info. Then he started saying Plz man, don tell me u gonna organize this ridiculous flashmob thing. Its really rather idiotic to do it in public, no offence. <<
Then I told him about how much we enjoyed the freeze we did today.
He: My goodness I can't believe Mr.Ee actually agree with such thing.
Me: Mr.Ee didn't.
He: Wait, is this a whole class thingy?
Me: Yep
He: Then why Mr.Ee not in it.
Me: He's the victim, the target.
He: My GOD.
Me: If you don't like the idea of flashmob then stop talking about it.
He:I seriously don believe it man. If u tell me u put a lizard in Einstein's pants, I still will. But WTF u realli do it?<[Referring to Flashmob]. This Flashmob thing is beyond my fking imagination. tok u later. I wanna gossip bout someone.

Okay.. so I'm dam fed up. In addition say gossip? Whoa, since when he gossip? Thought he always mock Calvin bout Gossip girls? He doesn't reallise that he doing it as well.
But this conversation of Flashmob 'Debate' ain't over yet.

He messaged me:Sry for the insult. But seriously Ns come first. Flashmob in jp can wait till after Ns. Don get me wrong bout objecting to flashmob.

Well, he say dun get me wrong to objecting flashmob? Apparrently, all he uses is= I can't believe, beyond my fking imagination, idiotic, ridiculous. <<>

Then I reply him: The way u speak is alrdy that point. I do this cause we've been working hard on projects and stuff. Wanna let em have fun. No need reply <<<>

Óut of the sudden, he just say this: I seriously think u get my speech wrong once again. I didnt say a single thing bout nort letting fun occur alrite. Don be so naive and sensitive ok?

MAN. THIS IS IT. THIS MESSAGE LEADS ME TO THIS TITLE, THIS BLOG, THIS STORY LINE.

Let me share with you my thought when I read his text msg. I seriously think u get my speech [speech? common, dun act as if u are a wanna-be host or tok big guy. speech? cheah. u used it wrongly buddy, nice try] wrong once again [What!? ONCE AGAIN!? LOL. Come on. Which one of u thinks differently from what i am thinking right now. U made me furious and u expect me to think peace and happy bunny jumping around izzit?]. I didnt say a single thing bout nort letting fun occur [I know u didn't, but the way u talk was fucking rude. Who the hell would have the mood to reply back when u talk like tt. I mean if u don't like flashmob u can just stfu and listen right? no need to give shitty comments when u don't like it. Actually I don't giva fuck!] alrite? [Yea, add alrite jus to lighten the tone up. Nice try shitter.]. Don be so naive and sensitive [WHAT THE? If tis was a sorry msg, u shld'nt even add negative remarks at all. Fucking tard. Look in the mirror, ur the one who's thinking naive, sensitive as well! You think that guys do blogs are sissy? ROFL. come on, u think blog for diary-like stuff? NO, it's for throwing your bad experiences u had and u jus have the feeling the let it out, but u don't know hu to turn to. AND ITS BECAUSE OF PEOPLE LIKE U.' your the one who's thinking naive.]
ok? [Another ''croc tone'' I shall call it..].

Ah, so much better. But seriously what do u think? Man, at time is really unfair. It's commonly never been a reciprocal.

My first title.

2009-07-19T05:29:00.000-07:00

I did'nt think that I would end up in a state like this. The reason why I blog is'nt for the purpose to expose my daily routine, but rather to share my reflections on regular day basis. Well, if you like to see pictures, then this is'nt the place for you to be in. It's rather a reader's blog actually.

Anyways, I know my English ain't that good. I'm still learning how to be a pro-typer to actually make my blog interesting. Haha!

So enjoy reading x=!