Bad.
Why?
I think everyone is losing patients on me. Perhaps, giving up hope on me?
What happened?
Plenty to talk about. So much that this post can be comparable with 1-31 July post.
Okay..
I'll tell u a bit.
Today..
Tuitor came my house. Didn't know why she looked a lil glummy.
The first time ever she was so frustrated on me. Cuz I didn't answer the question.
She wants ans desperately. I'm finding it! I'm finding it!
Sometimes, I just don't get the question, or uds the question. Applies to the passage as well.
What can I do. Can't check dictionary, not allowed.
Yes, its a practice. DUH. I know that.
Give me more time!
You know pressure plays a part too?
When people look at me, I tend to screw things up. I can't even handle things well when 1 person avert his/ her attention to me.
Buffled, confused. Its a perplexed situation that I can never explain.
Yea, reminisced what Nelly did. Was a funny thought though. The tuitor didn't treat her well. So, she did the same thing.
Yep, I followed her. I didn't treat her good. Pulled a long face.
Was thinking "You better treat me right. Or else say goodbye to your job." Though I know that she hae other kids to tuitor. [That's one good think bout being a tuitor. You'll never be jobless if you have a good qualification cert.]
I gave her thoe kinda glummy look. Lower tone till it's hell boring.
Hoping she was scared? Nah, fat hope. The situation worsened.
Yes. I beat around the bush all the time. I just can't tell someone if I hate him or her face to face. All my life, I've been either beating around the bush, forgiving / forget, or just simply walking away, having to say sorry in the end.
Never a reciprocal in life.
Thats why I hope to change and get my education right.
On second thought. Treating my friends mean is worth of your edu.?
Another bubble: Being straight forward doesn't mean that you have to be bad, mean, disgusting. Shit-like-fuck. [<< Don't ask me how I came out with this]
Once again, lost in more than just 1 way.
Nowadays, irritated by little noises, itchiness. Scratching myself to ease the itchiness was the normal think to do. But I would scratch till I feel the pain, till it's red, to ensure that there won't be that itchiness occuring at that spot ever again in my life. Thats how irritated and petty I was.
What's gotten into me? I don't know. My studies? Ain't doing well.
My sister. Ain't giving me the attention that was like before.
People say: You sure will pass one la. Sure score below 15 point one la.
Anything can happen if something goes wrong in your way.
Its like a car accident. Without awareness of surroundings, there goes your life, family, relatives, friends.
Just like now. Though its not as serious. Okay maybe, decides whether to pay school fees for another extra 1 year and waste 1 year of my life learning, experiencing all the same shit tht I had again. OR. Be promoted, elited by my achievement.
Once again. This sentence seems to appear very often.
So much to worry, so many to cater, so much to think, so many to fear, so many issues.
Endless.
The world. Creates all positive thing. Good, Happy, Yes, Satified, Enjoy, Joy, Positive, Love.
But some people came up with words that are opposite. Maybe through the theory of North and South pole?
Meaning, there's good. That means there sure must be an opposite meaning of that.
Bad.. That's how it came out? Maybe. Wild guess.
Soon, Bad, Sad, no, not satisfied, Negative, Hate came about.
The more I write. The more depression fills me.
I shall stop writing.
Labels: -Know yourself best is the way to start in this very world.